It’s me. Hi. I’m the problem, it’s me.

You know the moment.

It is not peaceful. It is not a gentle flicker of insight. It is panic. Sharp. Physical. Dread that rolls in before your brain can even form a sentence.

You stare at the ceiling, flooded with the realisation that something is not right — not one thing, maybe not even a clear thing, just this life you have somehow built that feels increasingly impossible to stay in.

Your chest tightens. Your jaw tenses. Your thoughts start racing. And somewhere inside you is a voice you have tried to ignore:

What if I have ruined it all?

This is not a passing wobble. This is the kind of anxiety that sticks. That repeats. That loops until you start believing it is not a thought — it is a truth.

And you have no idea what to do with it.

First: you are not broken

You are just awake to something you can no longer ignore. And yes — it is uncomfortable.Because finally admitting something is wrong feels like letting the whole thing unravel.

But here is the shift coaching offers: it helps you look at the panic without getting swallowed by it.

Not by avoiding it. By unpacking it — slowly, carefully, and with the right tools.

GROW — when you are not even sure where to start

The GROW model is not a magic formula. It is a structure that helps when your thoughts are spiralling and you need somewhere solid to begin.

G: Goal – What do you actually want?

This question is terrifying when you are used to performing rather than choosing. But we ask it anyway.

Not: What is your dream life?Just: What is missing? What would you like more of, or less of?

Sometimes the answer is painfully simple:“I want to feel like myself again.”

That is a valid goal. That is enough.

R: Reality – Where are you now, and what is it doing to you?

This is not a spreadsheet moment. It is what your body feels at midnight when the anxiety hits.

In coaching, we explore it honestly:

• What is happening in your life?

• What are you telling yourself about it?

• And how much of it is based on rehearsed beliefs that you have never questioned?

  
  

This is where NLP gets practical.

We look at:

• Internal dialogue: What’s the voice in your head saying? Whose voice is it? Is it yours, or someone you internalised ten years ago?

• Submodalities: Is the feeling tight, hot, fast? Does it come with images, sounds, textures? We break that structure down — not to suppress it, but to give you back control over how it lands.

• Patterns: When does this happen most? What triggers it? What does your body do? Where do you go — mentally, emotionally?

Because if we can map it, we can interrupt it.

The Timeline Activity — not nostalgic, forensic

You do not need to relive your past. But you do need to understand it.

We lay it out — decision by decision. Job. Relationship. Move. Turning point.

And at each one, we ask:

• What mattered to you at the time?

• What information did you have?

• What felt like the best decision then?

You start to see a pattern: You were not reckless. You were trying to survive. You were making the best choices you could — often without support, clarity, or space to think.

This activity is powerful because it shifts your relationship with regret.It does not rewrite the past. It reclaims it.

And then, with that awareness, we ask:

O: Options – What now?

This is where you get choice back.

Maybe nothing changes today. But you start to see again — where the gaps are, where the doors might be, what could be possible if you stopped trying to hold it all together on autopilot.

We do not leap into solutions. We stay with what could be different.We challenge the old rules that tell you:

• “You cannot walk away.”

• “You are too old.”

• “This is just what life is now.”

That is not insight. That is conditioning. And you are allowed to unlearn it.

W: Will – What are you ready to do — and what will try to stop you?

This is where coaching gets gritty.We do not just ask what you will do. We ask what part of you will try to talk you out of it.

And then we work with that.

We use NLP anchoring to build states you can access — when the fear hits, when the doubts spiral, when the anxiety says “stay small.”

We practise it. Over and over.

Because you do not just need insight. You need rehearsal.

Let us call it what it is

Midnight is not always poetic. Sometimes it is hell.You lie there, pulse racing, utterly convinced you have wasted time, potential, maybe even your life.

You have not.

You are just overdue a proper conversation with yourself — one that does not start with self-blame and end with paralysis.

So, here is the truth:

You are not too late.You are not beyond fixing.You are not broken.

You are just ready.

Ready to stop pretending.Ready to start asking better questions.Ready to feel something other than dread.

And coaching? Coaching is not a pep talk or a plan.It is a mirror. A map. A place to say, “I cannot keep doing this,” and finally figure out what you can do instead.

So if midnight is when the questions hit hardest — maybe it is also where the answers start.

Kintore Coaching. No hype. No nonsense. Just clarity.